Blog Post 2

First of all, my editors from class were Madison Kime and Simin Wang. Both of them were really helpful on pointing out things I wouldn’t be able to realize since I generally can’t edit my own writing and see overall problems until long after it’s due.

Madison’s comments were generally on where I could improve structure. I tried to change my sentences around when she said I needed better transitions and I did keep in examples she liked. She had a few sentences she was iffy about and I’m pretty sure I played around with them.

Simin had problems pinpointing my thesis statement, so I tried to edit my essay around what I thought was my thesis statement and I also tried arranging the sentences around it to seem less thesis-statey. And of course I tried tweaking the thesis statement. She found a problem with how the essay progressed to questioning the narrator’s sanity when I initially talked about depression, so I tried to make the depression paragraphs a little more clear.

Overall, I tried to go through each sentence to my ability and try and make them seem more precise. Hopefully that worked. Probably not because everything sounds okay in my head until someone points out how terribly it was written… C’est la vie.